Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Weekend part 2

Left off Saturday afternoon, still had a house guest and we started a couple games of poker. Taking too much of their money, I started to get ready to go out.

Didn't think it was going to be a big night as I was still feeling rough from the night before, but that changed quickly. Our buddy was working the bar and he gives good deals on drinks. A couple rounds later, and the night was picking up. Ran into a friends' sister I hadn't seen in a while, and we got along great catching up. Last call closing in, but none of us were ready to call it a night.

We decided to grab a 2-4 from some random place on Chinatown and met up to keep the night going. Lots of fun drunken conversations later, .... Hrm, I'm going to omit the next bit, but it was interesting....And I was done. Passed out and got a ride back home when I got up.

So Sunday was pretty much a write off, giving myself some much needed rest. Although things didn't unfold as expected, it was still a good night and I'm glad I decided to head out. But I find out later I was totally supposed to go somewhere else that night, and had it not turned out so well, I'd probably regret not going, but it ended up being worth it.

I'll have L this weekend, so it'll be much more low key. We have a swimming date with a friend and her son and I can't wait to get L in a pool.

Random non-weekend stuff (cause I don't want to make a wack load of posts):
- appulous is back, yay.
- rode on a new double decker bus
- didn't have change or tix for the bus this morning, but found active transfer when I got to the stop, yay free ride
- "ex" seems to think it's ok to send out complete lies and defame me to our friends, yet wants to "develop" a relationship for the benefit of our son. While I agree in principal, ain't gonna happen unless she clarifies that to all she sent it to. And, as she hates being proven wrong, I don't see it happening. But done are the days of allowing this attitude to continue.
- I get L back for the night tonight and can't wait to bring him out to the park and get all muddy.

And that's the weekend-to-now round up, minus the unmentionables ;)

-- Posted From My iPhone

Amazing weekend

Taking me a while to post, work's been keeping me busy.

This past weekend was awesome. On Friday, went out with a couple buddies to meet up with some girls over at this bowling place. Wii bowling skills don't exactly translate to real life, as I quickly learned with my first 2 balls going straight to the gutter. Adjusted to a lighter ball and kind of improved. I still did pretty bad, but managed to get a strike. One weird thing was I noticed my iPhone glow in the blacklights. I say it's weird because it was the back of the phone glowing. Usually blacklights make white-colored stuff glow, but this was the shiny black part glowing away.

Phone aside, my game never improved and I finished last. It was more fun than I expected and can see going back for another go. We finished up the pitchers and headed downtown for a few more drinks. It was pretty low key, and after, came back to my house.

We were all moving slow the next day. I was up first and killed some time by heading out and doing a little shopping for L. Others eventually got up and started discussing plans for the night.

Okay, so Saturday night was the better night, but I'll get to that next post. Gotta run.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Friday, March 27, 2009

These are the worst days

Every 2nd Friday sucks. This is the day L goes back to his mom's for the week. It marks the beginning of the long wait to see him again. I hate how he sees his daycare more than either of us.

So Thursdays are always treated special, and last night went great. We played outside, and L is getting over his extreme shyness. It's weird, I find if I'm holding him and someone tries to say hi to him, he bashfully hides in my arms. But outside walking around, he's going up to almost everyone he sees with his adorable "hi!" and sideways wave. He happily brings them rocks or leafs and is so proud of himself.

He also loves dogs! A neighbor came out with one and L basically forced us to run after them so he could see the puppy. We finished up playing and went inside to get cleaned up for dinner.

Everything went smooth with dinner and he 'helped' with the dishes. He's obsessed with the dishwasher and now that he understands me, it's great to involve him. I pass him a dish or cutlery and ask him to put it in.

We did some reading and toys before heading up for the bath routine. Recently I started putting all the bath toys in a basket and ask L to choose which ones he wants that night. As the water's filling, he grabs a few and puts them in the tub. Typical little boy in the tub, as we were finishing up and the water draining, he started pulling at his man parts. Oh L, I get him distracted with a toy and get him out.

We said 'night night' to each other and he snuggled up for bed. Must have been pretty tired from all the running around as he was quickly down for the count.

Thursdays are great... well, every other one ;)

Now to just get over this sickness I've had for the last while and things would be great.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Thursday, March 26, 2009

Two steps back

Urg, without the long drawn out, drama filled story, things are not going well.

"ex" sent me an email with concerns about my disciplinary milestone. She raised concerns that it's overly harsh for a toddler, etc etc and wondering where I got this idea from. Guess she forgot about all the nanny shows she used to subject me to. These were proven, effective methods. She said she didn't feel she'd be able to let his tantrum run its course, and concerned we're not doing the same thing at our respective homes. Sorry, but the fact she's not willing to use an effective method isn't my problem/fault. I merely relayed something that worked in my house.

But blah blah blah it all deteriorated to legal threats and demands. Seriously, if she would just act civilly, these problems would be easily resolved between us. Instead, chooses to spend money on a lawyer and act like I'm the worst person in the world. Nice way to treat your son's father. Can't help but think of the better use of those funds for the benefit of our son.

I'm so looking forward to the day when things get better. It's so frustrating to deal with these issues on a daily basis.

On the lighter side of things, Hendricks gin is the shit! My buddy got a bottle as a NY gift and has been hooked since. I have to admit, that's some tasty gin. Quickly replacing my Jack as the preferred drink, just too bad bars around town don't stock. He brought a bottle over yesterday and it reminded me I've got to get some.

Lord knows I could use it ;)

-- Posted From My iPhone

Wednesday, March 25, 2009


L is a baby. I haven't introduced any discipline with him, and instead, have always just re-directed his attention when things aren't going well.

Last night, we started his dinner, and didn't take long before he was done eating the meat. But he was still hungry, asking for more toast. I thought maybe he didn't like what was served, so I whipped up a different batch to make sure he was getting a proper meal. But when I gave him the alternate meat, he still refused and wanted more toast. I had the feeling he didn't want to try the 2nd batch because he thought it was just more of the same.

I tried to explain to him that if he eats just 1 little bite, I would "reward" him with more toast. This didn't go over well and he continued his refusal to try it. I took him out of his highchair and put him in a timeout (standing facing a wall). He cried up a storm and I tried to explain again that if he just tries the meat, we could go back to the rest of the meal.

A few minutes of crying later, we had a huge breakthrough. I asked again, 'do you want to try this 1 piece, if you do, I'll get you more bread' and you know what? He turned to me and said Yes. He put out his hand to get the meat, put it in his mouth and happily ate it! I was so proud! Gave him a big reward-hug, got him back in his chair, and he went on to clear his tray of food!!

Happy at the effective work, I thought I'd share this with his mom. She has told me before she has problems getting him to eat, and always asking for suggestions on how I do things so she can try the same techniques. So, I send her a text briefly explaining what happened, what I did, and the amazing result. What does she reply? " I didn't think we were forcing him to eat if he wasn't hungry?" okay, maybe I didn't explain it well enough, he WAS hungry, but was refusing to eat a portion of his meal. I re-explain that this wasn't a case of him saying he's done, but that he didn't want anything but toast.

I thought she'd appreciate the info, ask questions about my method, and possibly even thank me for the info. But any of that? Nope! Just straight up ignored after that. I really don't get what she wants. Calls in a panic when things aren't going well for her, but when I try and proactively help, I just get the rudeness. She says that co-parenting is important, but when I communicate, I get the feeling I'm a burden to her. Whatever, I'm confident as a father to L and will just continue to raise him how I see best.

I still can't believe just how well that worked out. From screaming refusal to happily finishing his meal, it was an amazing transition to see.

Kid development is an awesome thing to witness.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Has to be said

I thought it was understood, but I continue to see/hear things that my "ex" thinks I hate her.

So in an attempt to stop any further spiral of false info, I DO NOT hate her. Whatsoever.

I had hatred for her selfish actions, but that's something she'll have to live with.

The only hate I'm feeling is for the ridiculous situations and arguments that grow exponentially when it would just take a level headed look at the situation.

Ie, that blog post about being greeted by a "fuck off", when all her anger was due to me asking for a simple answer. All that was needed was a 2 second reply, and instead, thanks to the stubborness, turned into a big battle of heated words. It prevented our regular chat about how our son is doing, what new stuff he does, and all that other stuff we miss out on as we only see him part time.

I'd be so much happier if she would just cease with her smear campaign, grow up, and try to actually raise our son together but apart. I have nothing bad to say about her, only bad things to say about actions.

Curious what she writes? Check out the very loosely baby-based blog of "ex"

-- Posted From My iPhone

Monday, March 23, 2009

Guess I'll be posting stats

A shame really, but for one to announce that they don't read my blog at all, while the stats show daily checks, I guess I'll be posting the hard data to show the truth.

Again, that's my only goal in any writing dealing with "ex", to provide the other side to the wild stories being told.

Just another in the long line of saying 1 thing nicely publically, but doing the exact opposite when not in the public eye.

As a heads up, stats show every entry click, page views, times, etc. I've got 1 log from a constant visitor, with daily visits since the start. Oh yeah, forgot to mention it shows ISP and registration info about the visitors. ie, I see mail.COMPANYNAME.com.

Any guesses how often it IS checked?

-- Posted From My iPhone

Friday, March 20, 2009

What a nice greeting

"Fuck off" the 2 words said to me when "ex" dropped off L. Nice, huh? Why such the attitude? I can only guess it has to do with the frustration of getting an answer out of her yesterday trying to get a confirmation of a bill (in my name) paid. Just needed to know when and amount. What do I get? "For sure" ??? What does that mean, so I ask again to clarify, "I told you, for sure" ??? Obviously something lost in text land, so I tried calling. No answer. Weird, we were just texting, so phone's in hand. Try calling again, and she's shut off her phone. Nice one.

So then today, still needing an answer to let creditor know, I try her phone again. Not answering, again. Try a bit later, and get an answer, but it's her bf. Relay the message I need to speak with her and he lets me know he'll pass it along. Hours pass and I still don't hear back. I try her again and she actually answers! I explain that I need to know when and for how much this payment
will be made (over 90 days no payments already, I knew I had to stay on top of this, or would just get ignored like the last 2 months). She agrees to send me the details. Finally getting somewhere! Or so I thought.

Another hour goes by and still no msg :(. I call her again (getting pretty sick of hand holding at this point) and, again, explain that I need to get back to them and her msg is holding everything up. She agrees again, and end the call.

So what do I get? Her telling me $X amount is being sent to me today. Um, okay, except the amount isn't enough, and verbally was told it'd have to wait until next pay. Confused, I reply back letting her know the amount owed. I think she finally understands and says the full amount will come. Perfect, but why does it take ALL this shit just to arrive where we could've been last night when the simple question was first posed.

Bah! Getting back to the drop off, I was early getting home, so I texted her letting her know when I'd be home, and she could head over. Response? None. Doesn't tell me anything, and time just goes on. Getting close to normal drop off time, I head out to wait. Who's hear already? Her bf sitting in his car. Okay, so where is she? Try calling, but direct to voicemail. I see bf is on his phone, and figure he's chatting with her. See him end his call, so I try her again.

She answers "WHAT???!!" yelling at me. 'Just wondering where you are, when I'll get my son...' click. She just hangs up. WTF?!

How am I supposed to deal with this?

She arrives soon after and parks sideways across my and my neighbors' spots. 'Can you straighten this out?' I ask as she's still in the car. Completely ignored, she shuts the car off and jumps out with the above mentioned greeting. How fucking nice is that. No chance to ask how L's doing, no nothing aside from F.O. and starts walking to bf's car.

Normally at drop off, we drive the other back home. This gives us that chance to discuss L, but no chance here. I guess we can only do that when SHE wants something.

I chime back 'what the fuck? What's you're prob?' "Get the fuck away from me" she barks as I approach her to give mail that's come in. She gets this look like I'm going to hit her or something (never ever have, though I've been hit a fair amount of times), so I just stop. No point even trying to reason with her.

I get in the car, greeted with big smiles from L as he starts telling me some kind of story. I straighten out the parking and start to get him out. Only, where's his jacket? He's only got a jean jacket (puke) on, and while adequate for the current temp, I know there's still cold days ahead.

I phone her again, but she doesn't answer. Nice fucking communication. I call again, and bf answers. Don't know why it's so easy to get straight answers out of him when it's like pulling teeth to get anything from the person I wasted 7 years on, but he completely understood jacket would be required, and agreed to drop it off.

L and I spent the time playing around the yards, picking up stones, and just enjoying the outdoors.

Bf dropped off the jacket, and now I might actually get a few days of calm. Woohoo!!

Why is it always SO difficult??

-- Posted From My iPhone

Beejiving no more

I got a disconnect email letting me know I've been logged out of Beejive's IM app, so launched it up to re-connect. It opens up, but as it logs me in, I get a weird "PC load letter" error message. Okay, that's weird. Clicking the screen opened up YouTube to a clip from Office Space about stealing being bad (ending with the part where the group smashes their hated printer(fax machine?).

LOL. Looks like they've introduced some anti-piracy measures. A quick google searched revealed I wasn't alone, and more and more people were finding out they've been cut off.

Not a huge deal, many options available as a replacement, but I did like Beejive's functionality, it's just not worth the $16US pricetag. Maybe if I used multiple IM accounts (it supports many like aim, yahoo, etc so you can send a message to your contacts at any of these services), but I don't, and just want a simple app for using MSN.

Grabbed a new one called MobileChat, so we'll see how it goes as a replacement. Seems a lot more basic, but I don't need it to do much.

I'll be keeping an eye out for a patched version of beejive anyway though, and still hoping they release mini versions of it where you pay less, but only get 1 IM client (msn for me).

Still though, that's one of the best "friendly" anti-piracy methods I've seen.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Thursday, March 19, 2009

Guess I'm a Bastard..?

Today I met up with "ex" so we could go scope out a potential school to put L into. As he's 18 months now, more daycare options are open to us. This place seemed great. They do cool activities with the kids, great location, offer good structure, etc, but no mention of cost on their website.

On our way over, I noticed she wasn't wearing her anniversary ring (I mentioned before that I thought it odd she did post-marriage) and asked her about it. She brushed it off saying when her attire is paired with gold, she doesn't wear it. She asked why it even mattered to me since she bought it herself. ??? What? I tried to remind her how it was my gift to her (it was the paper anniversary, so I actually got her a drawing of a ring explaining she could go pick it out, and gave her a budget), but apparently, the way she remembers it now is that I got her nothing it seemed. So somehow I guess I'm a bastard that got my wife nothing on our anniversary. I just shrugged it off and just didn't want to get into anything over something that really doesn't matter.

We get to the school and have our interview. Everything is great about it and would love to see L in a place like that. But, of course, it costs money. It's not wildly expensive, but a fair chunk more than now, and likely won't be do-able :(. I'll have to look into it more, but I'm about to have significant financial changes soon (sell my home and go back to renting an apt, car situation, etc) that I won't really know if I can manage it. I'm sure there's other options as well, and I could end up moving to a different area of town, so I think we'll have to stuck with our language barriered lady for now.

I can't wait to get him into a school like that soon though. The kids do gymnastics, martial arts, daily crafts, excursions, etc and I can't help but think he's just playing with toys in a basement all day at daycare. I know his mom feels the same and anxious to get him moved.

I can't wait for tomorrow as my week with him begins. I hear he's got a cold right now so I hope I can get him feeling better. Always with the sickies, poor lil guy :(

-- Posted From My iPhone

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Dear abbey

I read about 10 newspapers a day, and always come across a dear abbey type letter every now and then that just hits close to home....had to post this one.

Barbara: My wife and I had a beautiful baby boy about five months ago. Everything started out great and we seemed to be pretty much in sync. Lately, my wife has become more and more concerned, apparently for no reason. She acts as though the baby cannot be alone, even if happily playing and cooing.
I get frantic phone calls from her at work about non-emergencies. Often I speak with her mid afternoon and she tells me she has not had time to have even a bite of food. I am trying to be supportive, I let her vent when I can. I bring her flowers and help out with the baby as much as possible.
Can you suggest anything that might help? I am no saint and I know my actions are not perfect. Sometimes I get sucked into stupid arguments that I should be able to just walk away from, or sometimes I am lazy and don't do as much as I could.
I feel she needs to take care of herself in order to best take care of the baby but less and less I feel like we are a team with a new baby and more like I'm in charge of some new neurosis that has come from nowhere in her.

Dear Father: A new mother becomes immersed in the life of her baby and fathers get shut out. Winnicott called it "primary maternal preoccupation" and felt it was a biological state whereby the mother becomes exquisitely in tune with her baby psychologically.
While the mother is very much wrapped up in her worries about the infant, the father, who is doing the best that he can, feels very excluded. I think you are feeling angry with your wife and then guilty, which leads to what you call "being lazy."
You don't feel like helping anymore because your own wishes to be loved and cared for by your wife (like she used to do before the baby) become strong. You are missing her attentiveness to you. You and your wife need to talk about your feelings.
She needs to know that you want to help her but sometimes you'd like to know that she still needs you and wants to please you, too. Then try to understand that she may not be able to think about pleasing you now. It may take every bit of her loving energy to look after your son. You may simply have to weather the stormy period and understand that she is hard-wired to love the baby more than you right now. Otherwise, how can a mother give and give and give the way mothers must when babies are small?
This phase will pass, your son's needs will lessen in time and hopefully you and your wife will feel more "in sync."

Barbara Burrows is a psychoanalytic psychotherapist at the Candidate Toronto Psychoanalytic Society & Institute. She can be reached at www.barbaraburrows.com

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

iPhone 3.0

Today Apple announced the new 3.0 OS' features and a bunch of highly anticipated ones coming to light... finally.

Copy/paste! One of those must-have-been-forgotten features finally coming (natively). There've been many times I wanted to send someone a link, or quote text, and I've had to type it all out. There was a seperate app you could get to do this, but wasn't a great built-in feature.

3rd party 'push' notification! Push makes updates in real time. Think getting a text message, when it comes it, your phone alerts you. This is what I've been using Backgrounder for, but again, being built into the OS is a much better way to go.

Landscape mode for all! The iPhone has so many different rules for the keyboard. Sometimes you only get a stripped down qwerty layout with all symbols tucked in a shift-click type mode, sometimes you get a few high-use symbols alongside the qwerty keys, sometimes you can use landscape mode and unleash the full power of 2 thumb typing but other times you can't. Well, this addresses the last variation. Biggest help will be landscape mode for text messaging. I know I can type much faster in landscape, but I do find I miss the top row more often and end up tapping into the text block which of course moves the cursor. I still would really like to see custom layouts allowed. There's certain symbols I would find useful to have available for 1 click use.

MMS replacing SMS! Now you'll be able to send pics etc as attachments to text. I could do this with my razr, but not the iPhone out of the box. There are apps for this too, but see the theme? Integrated is so much better!

Peer 2 Peer! This seems pretty interesting. You'll be able to connect to other iPhones via bluetooth or wifi. Uses could be for multiplayer games, file sharing, etc. It seems like more and more friends have the iPhone, that I can see putting this to good use.

There's something like 100 changes/updates in 3.0 to the current 2.2.1, but lots of minor stuff packed in there.

The shitty part though?? It's not coming until summer :(. Then I have to wait for the jb version. Oh well, 3rd party apps it is.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Monday, March 16, 2009

Touring around

I had a pretty busy weekend, taking advantage of the week off from L. Big birthday weekend for a bunch of friends. Friday went out with one of the celebrators to some new burger joint he'd heard of.

I fully expected pub-style burgers n beers, but was pretty suprised by what this place was like. I forget this place's name, but completely different than what I expected. High ceilings, bright lights, minimal booths, this place did not seem like something we'd hit up in a bday context. Whole thing looked like a waiting area for take out orders rather than a sit down spot.

Looks aside, on to the menu. Buddy there laughing uncontrollably at the chance to "design" his burger. You take an order form (oddly made on puke bags), fill out what you want and submit. All options were there including the perplexing sides choice. You can get fries/pop added for $2, but if you want just fries, it was $2.50?? Substitute the fact we were all getting beers instead, we needed help to finalize our orders.

Now, that was a good burger! Can definately see poppin in there for some take out goodness.

Bounced from there to a pub where another buddy works. Polished off 3 pitchers amonst 3 of us rather quickly, then hit up the college radio station where some friends were playing. Couple drunken shouts in the mic later, and ready to call it a night.

Sat had a ton going on, but took me a while to get moving. Hit up a friend's store that was hosting an addidas anniversary event. Open bar was a big plus, but was also a nice little jam with some cool art on display. Headed over to the multi-bday party, and as usual, saw a bunch of old friends, but open bar calling our names, and car parked near there, so headed back over.

Then, off to another bar where the bday shenanigans continued. Met a few interesting people, and looking forward to running into them soon. Hopes not high, but who knows.

That all pretty much set the stage for another hangover day at home. So just chilled at home, bbq'd a nice big steak, and did a bunch of house cleaning.

Now back in the grind :/

-- Posted From My iPhone

Sunday, March 15, 2009

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Ah, marriage

I was reading "ex"'s blog, and she posts these stupid Q&A's on fridays to try and get comments and traffic. This one was questions for a pre-teen girl pretty much, with 1 question being 'do you think you'll get married' and her answer basically said it's in the works, and stay tuned for details. HAHAHAHA. Oh man.

Not sure if she realizes, but we're still married. We've been seperated since aug (more like april though). August was 7 months ago, and in that time between, there've been a few guys, with the current one going since xmas time. That's 4 months.

She still wears a ring I got her, our anniversary one I think (that or the wedding band). As much as she may like it, or place different meaning on it, it's still a ring given to celebrate our marriage.

I laugh because I think it's just another act in the long line of her going down a road she's not even sure she wants to be on. Constantly trying to be happy, but using other people to do it. I really do hope for the best, but just hope she gets things sorted out before going down the same path.

She continues to spread lies around though, and that really sucks. On facebook, all our common friends were removed as she told them there were legal proceedings going on, she couldn't talk about it, and was going to remove them from her friends. News to me! Why always with the legal threats? I'm just trying to get away from all this bs.

I think this stems from the warped thought that I tried to ruin her plans to go out for her friends bday by using info I somehow got off the site and then changing my day of the week with L. Oh man, I guess doesn't remember that her profile was invisible to me, that friend isn't on my list and her bday not shown, not sure how I would possibly know it was her bday. Speaking ill is speaking ill. Whether she's doing it privately or publically, I don't think it matters.

We were even kind of (little bit) getting along for 5 minutes too, and now all soured up again. Getting real tired with this routine :/

Bah, now that that's out of my system, off to enjoy the weekend!

Oh yeah, adorable pic of L:

-- Posted From My iPhone

Friday, March 13, 2009

No contact is good contact

Ending my week with L, and it's been pretty great. He was sick when I got him Friday, and as I wrote before, he was back on track sat, recovered Sunday.

But holy, was "he's doing fine, I'm taking care of it" enough for "ex"? No. Got contstant texts and emails demanding to know what was happening at every step of the way. Well that's fine and dandy for her to want to know what's going on, what more can I provide as an update? Sorry, but I'll let you know if things are bad. If I tell you things are better and I'm taking care of him, leave me to it.

What's worse was her telling me what I had to do through this. That shit just won't fly, and I asked to be left alone to enjoy my time with him. If you can't allow me to parent our child we've got way bigger problems that L having a flu :( I think the point was finaly understood, and had a peaceful rest of the week.

L's saying so many words now! I still love the simple ones of 'hi' and 'bye' to people, but it's so cool to see him try and repeat words you've just said. Daycare lady has him calling me papa, because she's spanish, but I keep trying to get him to use daddy. It's hard when she gets to be around him so much more than I do. And the language barrier. I know I'm going to have to learn a bit of spanish, if only to be able to keep up with liam. I found some spanish fisher price movies for him too.

I can't believe how scared of the vacuum he is! Even around the little handheld, he instantly cringes. I had to do a little cleaning and only way was to hold him in one arm while the other pushed around the vacuum. L was fists clenched and terrified, but made it through. I thought kids loved things like that, and would try and push it around themselves..? Ah, little shy guy.

Today I only get to see him for a little bit in the 'after daycare, before trade off' time, but still looking forward. He's always really chatty when I first get him.

As much as I'll miss him, can't wait to blow off some steam this weekend. Much needed after feeling sick this last while!

-- Posted From My iPhone

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

In the mix(es)

Valentine's Day set redux
Click Here To Download


DJ Rap - So In Love With You / Proper Talent
Craggz & Parallell Forces - 100% Poison / Product
Jon [S] & Wize - Roller Rink / Music First
Tali - High Hopes / Full Cycle
Marcus Intalex & ST Files - 9x9 / Reinforced
Sonic - Kashmiri Twist / Space
Influx UK vs Landslide - It's Not Over / Hospital
Craggz & Parallel Forces - Fizzy Piglets / Valve
Marky & XRS - Closer / Soul:R
Calibre - Hypnotize / Soul:R
J Majik ft. Cathy Brown - Love Is Not A Game / Infrared
Aquasky - Do Anything / Incident
John B - Blue Eyeshadow / Nu Electro (w/ Electronic teased for a bit)
Craggz & Parallel Forces - Love Insane / Valve
EZ Rollers - RS2000 (Fillibuster rmx) / Moving Shadow
Pascal - P Funk 2004 / True Playaz
London Elektricity - Cum Dancing VIP / Hospital
J Walk - Another Lover (Influx Datum rmx) / Warner
John B - American Girls / Nu Electro (though ended set with Whitney Dub at the club instead)

Live @ Lotus Lounge
Shaun Doe & MC Ceasar
Rumble In The Jungle Vol 2

Click Here To Download

Cartel - Machines / Cartel
Concord Dawn - Blow / Uprising
Stakka & Skynet - Decoy / Underfire
Dieselboy - Invid / Palm
Ray Keith - Terrordome 2002 VIP / UFO
DJ Rap - Ruffest Gun Ark / Proper Talent
DJ SS - Rollidge (Twisted Individual rmx) / VIP
DJ:Echo & Sabotage - House Music / Frequency
Influx UK - My Name Is Universe / Formation
Muffler - Falling / Moving Shadow
Hive & Gridlok - AC DC / Violence
Twisted Anger & Danny C - Fruit Bat / Dread
DJ Slip - Aftermath / Vinyl Syndicate
Red One - Believe In U / Liftin Spirits
Militia - You And I Know / Charge
DJ:Ecco & Sabotage - Staring At The Sun / Frequency
A-Sides - Tear / East Side
Bad Company - The Nine / BC
Breakage - So Mars / Bassbin
Tech Itch - The Rukus / Penetration
Dom & Roland - Paradrenasite / Moving Shadow
Skynet - Night Raiders / Black Sun Empire
Teebee - Let Go / Subtitles


-- Posted From My iPhone

Monday, March 9, 2009

Bloggin in point form

Don't feel like typing it all out, so going point form.


- SSH'd into my phone, found the recordings and was able to save them both.
- live set completely redlined and hardly audible. Cool crowd noises on it, but sounds like mush (not the dj, lol).
- found out they recorded the sets proper (!), but listened to mine and it sucked (¡). Monitor situation was bad, but didn't think I was that 'off'.
- replay mix of valentines day set decent. Going to convert to mp3 and upload.
- will provide links and tracklists for both sets here. tomorrow...?

L & "ex"

- L feeling much better it seems. Fever gone, still a little cranky though.
- will upload lil video of him on the decks, not sure if you can tell, but shows him dancing. He's been doing that more and more.
- "ex" constant harrassing this weekend. Wants updates, no problem, provide. But then starts telling me what I have to do, not listening and completely unreasonable. Doesn't get the fact that I am his primary caregiver when he's with me. Sorry, but don't tell me how to be a dad when you're breaking down in tears
- has magic powers that affect the internet. Can somehow block urls, interesting and unexplained (obvious lie)
- found a new baby einstein movie, watched while drawing. Quite the little multitasker already.
- still showing signs of being a lefty :( hehe


- good weekend with L, happy doing better.
- took him out for some fun activities yesterday and wore us both out.
- feeling really ill today. Totally f*%king pwnd that toilet. Urg.

And, where'd the nice weather go? From tshirt to freezing in 12 hours. Boooooo!! :(

-- Posted From My iPhone

Saturday, March 7, 2009

DJ & Daddy'in

Yesterday I took over L for the start of our week. As I had said, he's been sick and his mom had to get a urine sample (messy job) to the lab. Negative results, so likely dealing with a virus. Not in the greatest mood when I got him, but better than Wednesday.

We played for a bit, then tried a bit of dinner. He still wasn't eating that much, so I was glad he got a good chunk of it down.

We got packed up for a visit/stay at my parents. I had a gig later that night, so they were going to keep watch over L. My mom got a bunch of animated movies and he was captivated. Again, he didn't really want his bottle and settled with water.

The gig went really well, but another failed test of iProRecorder. I didn't have high expectations as when I was getting it ready while the dj ahead played, it was red-lining the volume completely. But I tried it anyways, set it to record and put it away from the speaker as much as I could. Set finished, hit stop and have a 1 hr 19 min recording...perfect. Put my phone away and finish the night.

I check it this morning because I wanted to hear if it was even audible, and it won't load. Shows up in the list as the 1hr+ recording, but can't play it. I go to the details, and it shows the length as 4700 some seconds but 0 size :(

So looks like another crappy attempt. Hopefully I can't tweak the bugs out and get it working properly.

L was doing much better in the morning. Ate a big breakfast and lunch. He was amusing himself playing with my house plants. Kind of feeling and grabbing at them, and trying to pick them up. I distracted him by using his cup to water the plants, and he took over immediately. He went around to the different plants and shook his cup to water them all.

Now down for a little nap before we head out running errands. It's so nice outside today, finally a glimpse of spring! Otherwise, it'll be a pretty chill weekend as I get him back to 100% and ready for daycare, hopefully. It'll all depend on how he's feeling tomorrow, but I think he's close to kicking it... we'll see.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Thursday, March 5, 2009

L sicky

Yesterday was my night with L during "ex"'s week, so met up after work for the trade off. Immediately I notice L's not looking too hot. I didn't get the normal big smiles when he sees me.

I get him home, take off his winter wear, and start to play. Well that was the idea, but seemed like L just wanted to cuddle. I got him a big cup of water and he downed it while hanging off my arms. I kept trying to engage him in activities, but he only wanted to stay on me. So we cuddled for about 20 mins as I noticed his grip on his sippy cup loosening. A matter of seconds later, the cup's dropped and L's passed out on me.

I brought him upstairs and changed him, and found him pretty warm. I took his temperature, not his favorite thing (good sign for the future, haha) and he's not shy about it, and found he had a mild fever. I also saw his wonky ear was really red. To the touch it was warm, but more oddly was that L flinched and pulled my hand away from his ear.

I dosed him with Motrin for his fever, cuddled him to sleep, then put him down for a nap. Worried about his ear, I googled the symptoms, and it seems he's got an ear infection, with the fever being brought on by that.

I called his mom to let her know what was going on, as it seems like a doctor's visit was required. A little "debate" ensued about how to get him in, but resolved. She was understandably concerned and thought I should call TeleHealth. I've called them before, but I find them kind of useless. They always seem to tell you what you already know. But where L is concerned, I have no hesitation to be over cautious. Told her I'd give an update after I finished that call.

Well, didn't get an RN, but only a receptionist. Asked for some brief details, and told me wait times were about 60-75mins! Then the best question, "did you want to stay on hold, or give your phone # to get a call back?". Haha, no way would I want to stay on hold for over an hour.

I call his mom back to let her know the delay, and tried reassuring her that things were being taken care of and I would be monitoring him for any changes. I texted her what I found online and the fact that a big instigating factor for ear infections is exposure to cigarette smoke. I know her neighbors smoke like chimneys as she's complained since day 1 about it. What to I get as a reply? A phone call wondering what the hell I'm implying by telling her that. I guess she misinterpreted my possible diagnosis of the cause as an attack on her current bf. You see, he's a smoker. Yup, one of "ex"'s most hated "qualities" about me, one she swore she'd never put up with, but again made the exception. I honestly doubt he would ever smoke near L, and meant nothing of the sort by telling her one of the things that couldve brought this sickness on. Reassured I'm not trying to attack her, or have any hidden intentions, and end the call.

Finally get the call back from TeleHealth, give him the details, and he asks about medication I've given. I explained the dose of Motrin, and he asked what concentration is..? I don't know, it's the standard Infant's Motrin and the bottle is in L's room. Knowing he needs this info, I try and slink into his room to grab the medication, find the concentration and relay the info. He asks L's weight, then based off that and the medication, tells me the dosage amount to give. Yeah, thanks, that info is on the bottle and yes, I can read. Steps repeated with Tylenol, again, only to give me dosage amounts found on the bottle.

During this, I hear L stir, so I poke my head around and see he's awake. Finish the call with the RN with the expected recommendation to keep giving fluids and that he see his Dr, but it wasn't an urgent, cheo-nightmare inducing problem. Good news, but that's what I figured after reading up online.

Call his mom to let her know the outcome and assure her I'll handle things that night. But he's up now, so I gave him the Tylenol dose. I brought him down and tried to engage him with mild activity. Gave him another glass of water while I prepared his bottle. When his bottle was ready, he wasn't interested. Much preferred his water, and wasn't keen on playing. So we cuddled up on the couch and I put one of his movies on.

There was a scene where the puppets were yawning, and looking over at L, see he's getting tired too. I try his bottle again, and now he wants it. So I bring him upstairs, change him to his pj's, and we finish his bottle. L goes right back to bed after.

Poor little guy :(

But the night went smooth, he hardly woke when I went in for his next dose of meds. He slept through the night, but had 0 interest in his bottle this morning. Also had 0 interest in letting me get ready for work :(. I call "ex" to see if I can go over now (earlier than expected) and have her drop me back at home so I can get ready for work. She agrees and I'm out the door with L. That was very helpful and prevented a guaranteed late morning arrival.

Made it into work, and all I can think about is how he's doing. I remember "ex" saying something about their household all not feeling well on this past weekend, so I'm hoping this is the tail end if things, and he improves for my takeover this weekend.

Oh yeah, that is the reason I took Wednesday this week for the trade off. I wanted as much time in between them being sick and my takeover. But other assumptions were made about my date choice, and I notice some good friends missing from fb. Do a little investigating, and find some pretty disturbing stuff.

Apparantly going around telling people I'm using their fb account info to track "ex"'s life details, and that they should delete me. I'm sorry, that's delusional. And that's the tip of the iceberg to the things she's telling people in closed doors. It really sucks too, not that they were best friends or anything, but some were really good friends that I enjoyed hanging out with. I completely concede that some were her friends first, but over the years, I thought we were closer than I guess is true. Disappointing!

I'll be very happy when all this bad mouthing stops, until then I can only vent my frustration with the situation.

What a night! Hope you're feeling better bud!!

-- Posted From My iPhone

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

iProRecorder impression

Last night I had the chance to put the iPR app to the test. I dj'd a valentine's day event, and I want to record the mix I played. I set up my phone in airplane mode to prevent calls or messages from interrupting the recording. Launched up iPR, hit record and started mixing.

Now, what I really wanted was to be able to connect the iPhone direct to the mixer's record-out, so it records the feed directly. But iPR records over the mic, so has me worried about sound quality. But, I'm not making mixes for sale or anything, so I can live with a cut on quality if it means I'm able to use something I already own to accomplish the task adequately. Because there are actual hardware devices that do what I'm trying (connects to the mixer and records HQ sound), but I want a phone solution.

While everything seemed to go well, there were a few things I noticed couldve been done better. I hadn't set it to high quality, and I hadn't properly played with the volume boost setting to maximize sound without peaking the limits. Will have to remember to change some defaults to prevent that.

Finished the mix, about an hour and 20 mins, and right away, I almost deleted the file. While I find most apps fairly straight forward in terms of GUI, occasionally you just don't know where to click to do what you want. Luckily enough, my recording was safe.

So now to get it off the phone. Apparantly, the way it works is the phone uploads the file to the company's website, and once done, they email you a link to download. Sounds smart enough, until I think about it more. This mix is in the area of 200MB. Uploading that through a cell connection is going to take a while, and sure enough, the app crashes after trying for a little while :(

But I know the mix is safe, so I'm going to SSH into the phone and poke around until I find the file. Then, I'll just pull it on to my computer and be done, as long as it comes in the WAV format it's supposed to be recorded in. I have a bad feeling that the app could use some kind of proprietary format that only converts to WAV after it's sent to their server. Fingers crossed that's not the case.

With any luck, I'll be able to do that tonight. But tonight is also my night with L, so might not get around to it. Sure I've got sometime after he goes to bed, but i've also got some spots in Skate 2 calling me. & still need to get another set together for Friday, as I'll be changing things up for that event. Don't need to be playing lovey-dovey valentines music, much prefer to play a harder set.

Weird little side note, A Channel, Ottawa's local station has cancelled the 6pm & 11pm news! I find that crazy, not that I watched it, just never thought they'd can the news program. Stupid Sandra Blaikie.

Next app to check out, this sleep helping app (send out deep sleep promoting sounds). Interesting.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Tuesday, March 3, 2009

Backgrounder to the rescue

I found exactly what I needed to combat the Apple imposed restrictions on 3rd party apps. The iPhone doesn't allow for 3rd party app to run in the background. Introduce Backgrounder into the equation and you get full control to have apps remain open after you return to the springboard. This should work perfectly for my current Internet radio app dilema, but also got me thinking about using it on other apps.

For instance, if I launch BeeJive (my current msn solution) then close it, I do remain logged in, but I don't get notified directly when msgs come in. Instead, it sends me an email, and since my mail app is set up to check for new msgs, it notifies me an msg came in. Not the greatest, but it's been working adequately.

I'm thinking if I use this Backgrounder app on it, that it will automatically notify me that there's new msgs. I'm expecting it to function similar to text messages where a little number will appear over the app's icon when there's something new. We shall see. Same with facebook and some other apps; then I wonder if it'll affect things like battery life or cause memory problems or something. Again, I guess I'll find out soon enough.

Need/want to run apps in the background? Check out Backgrounder available in Cydia, it's free too, so just need a jailbroken phone to run.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Monday, March 2, 2009

Internet radio apps

I'm busing this week, and this morning I went to play some music for my trip but had no music sync'd on my phone. I remembered I used to have an app called Last.FM installed (wasn't a big fan though) and figured I'd find something like it on appulo.us to fill the musical void.

I came across this one called Pocket Tunes, and though it did the job (found BBC Radio 1xtra and some decent hip hop), still didn't have all that much to choose from. It also didn't allow me to close it and launch something else without the music stopping, and that's just terrible. The ipod player lets you run it in the background, I'd expect the same from a radio app.

So my hunt continues. I've heard of one that allows you to connect to your PC's music library, which sounds promising, but I kind of like the random tunes I come across. I'll do some searching around to see what else is out there by the power of google.

-- Posted From My iPhone

Stalker city

Well, first off, have to say that I personally don't see reading people's blogs as stalking. Though, some have expressed their own opinion on the matter.

So at what point does a repeat visitor become a stalker? Not that it bothers me, but I do find it odd some of the stats I've already seen.

Welcome repeat visitor(s), I'll try and keep things interesting for you, though things are pretty dull around here. If you are a stalker, I'm sure you'll get bored soon enough, but here's one for your stalker wall:

-- Posted From My iPhone

Sunday, March 1, 2009


So I can no longer COMMENT about my son on her blog. Simple sharing of experiences no longer accepted. That is such petty BS. I cannot believe how pathetic that is.

I posted about how L's learning all these new words daily and sometimes hard to distinguish babble from his limited Spanish. What happened? Deleted. And now adding in comment approval. Fucking lame!

Whatever, live your bitter life in your bubble. Shield yourself from reality. It's really working so far isn't it??

Did you know "ex" is really good at web development? She's a bit modest about it, but always up to the challenge. Quite the photoshop expert too. Whether it be cropping pics, or documents, her skills with ps are vast.

She made this pretty much on her own: http://www.jenny-shaun.com

Highlight was definitely, here is an expert


-- Posted From My iPhone

Oh, and happy 1.5 years!!

Mr L is 18 months old now. Wow!! Love you kiddo!!

-- Posted From My iPhone

Silly blogger, hiding's for pussies

Seriously. It's akin to talking shit about someone under your breath and when they ask you to repeat yourself, you say it was nothing. If you don't have the courage to post publically, maybe you should re-evaluate what you have to say.

But it was good proof that the shit talking continues behind "closed" doors. Adding in to the petty pile that's been overflowing lately. I really wonder when the time will come that this can be a thing of the past. But for now, it continues. From commenting here, then deleting it; to deleting my comments relating to my son on blog posts about him. It's old!! Get over it. Live n let live already.

Or continue and have things escalate. That'll be just swell. I know I just fucking love this constant retarded shit as a daily dose in my life.

Yay, that was the crap I wake up to after a great night out. Now back to...... whatever, you don't need to know.

-- Posted From My iPhone